MY FICTIONS LYRICS

"A Recurring Dream"

When I woke up it was cold and I did
not know just how long I'd been
asleep; anxious from what I dreamt.
So I wrote a forced epilogue about
holding on because I've given up on
grabbing, I'm just going to let myself
fall. Save the miserable lines for
another time; I've been collapsing
into myself to much to focus on a
few words. It's an insignificant song
I don't care about because the saddest songs
I ever wrote were sewn from all the things
I stole. I never had and I'll never know because
I didn't want to. All that you're taking is
that which I did not want if that means
anything. I'm not sure if it even does,
but what is anything I have but a speck
of insignificant luck? All I know is
I don't feel so inclined to rid myself
of the way that I feel when I feel like
I've wasted your time. Let it rest,
well goddamn it I guess I'll get back
to it, I've been leeching off the past
I have sucked the blood from what
was left. This exercise in autobiography
should be torture for someone as removed
as me, but I leech. If it lasts forever,
then why document? The say everyone feels
it, but it's still not resonant. Misery,
you found me, I always knew you'd come
for me. You've been speaking to me in my
goddamn dreams but by the time I woke up
you had come and left me. We speak of
holding on but we can latch ourselves to
something out of sight.

And the worst is I saw an end to this.
But that wasn't enough I guess.
It wasn't enough to know that I'd
be miserable - I had to lie in that grave.

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